Also praying that I am not pregnant. In fact, he seems quite terrified of me at the moment, when I am getting upset and seems to be holding me at arms length. Getting involved with an alcoholic will always end in tears. Only problem it was a two hour drive from our house. I let it go and we went out and had fun. I have been six years with my boyfriend, Horrible things have happened while he is under the influence of alcohol, he will seem fine for a while and then a binge.
I rarely drink at all now since my husband seems to see my leisure sips of wine as a green light to Indy 500 style drinking for him. After all, he knows I have had a problem with her and for good reason! I desperately need his emotional support but am frightened to convide in him in case he gets upset or angry with me. He never had time for his children because he spent his time looking for the next relationship. He is definitely in trauma and all I want to do is hug him close. I have full faith in him that he will give himself completely and courageously to the healing process. I don't want to ask my friends or family because I don't want them to have a negative opinion of him. I am not and recently found out that he has been pleasing me and not discussing his own needs.
I mean all people who commented here , I think, are undergoing or underwent the same situation. We went out with family to sing karaoke the other night. You just never know what kind of drama will be waiting for you on the other side of your front door or on the other end of your phone. I wonder what kind of stories she is telling them? The truth is they are afraid of him. This is the most disappointing and hardest thing that has ever happened to me. What did he actually say to her? I know it seems like your world is falling apart right now, trust me I know the pain all too well.
Hi all, I have never been here before and never thought I would have a reason to post here but I thought you all might be able to help me. It is no fun to be involved in a relationship with an alcoholic. But I have been lied to constantly, seen her go off with a member of the opposet sex and spend 2 nights with him nothing happens so she claimed. He needs to make the decision to help himself. We alchaholics for what ever reason could not love ourselves.
I keep plugging away trying to save the house. I do not feel he will be able to cope with me and provide me with the emotional support I will need after our baby is born. I started distancing myself from her. He had an extremely traumatic childhood. We broke up once and returned as a couple.
I handled all the finances and was considered the bread winner. Mind you my 17yr old felt he needed to stay and take care of his dad while my youngest 12 yr old came with me. I finally saw that there has to be more to my life than being second best to alcohol. Take care of yourself and your children. I thought we knew each other well.
Eventually, I kicked him out and he did put himself in a treatment program and sobered up. Figure it out, you have a brain and you have to be strong and think of yourself and the kids. I cannot have the girl I have been waiting for, see what I have seen. She is the fun aunt, life of the party and it drives me insane. I wish I could have him far way so I can move on. You eventually become depressed and ill from the anxiety caused by these binges, never knowing when the person you love will evaporate into thin air. Wow indeed Ah, relationships with someone from dysfunctional roots can feel soooooooo exciting when the chaos is mistaken for excitement! It frightens and upsets me to think he could cause an accident that harms a young family causing them all the hurt our family has gone through.
He certainly would never admit that if it were an issue that it ever affected him. She will only communicate with me via email because she says seeing me and hearing me just causes her to shut down. He cut communication with everyone by the way, family, mom, me. You won't need help as it will be real clear if you use your head about what is appropriate. He has helped me realise that I am very critical of myself and others, including him, and has encouraged me to seek counselling which I will soon start. Yes -- not only did he and his ex drink alone together one night, but he also let her drink the special surprise drinks that he got for me. We have been together for three years.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel for you. All you can do is inform them about alcoholism why not direct them to , tell them how you feel about their drinking and then let them do what they will with the information. The damage is immense and I am broken hearted for all of you. He's not mean or nasty or violent. Giving Them Ultimatums: You can tell them that you are not going to tolerate their behavior if they do not terminate their involvement with the other person. His brothers and sister all cut him out of their lives. I did not grow up with alcoholism or irrational outbursts of anger like I am seeing now.
I love them both and I want to be a good husband and Dad. I watched your YouTube video on the book you have written and am wondering if I bought it for her would that just make things worse? He has a problem with bringing other women into our marriage. I hope this helps anyone that feels stuck in a marriage to an alcoholic who refises nor wants help. Many recovering addicts have done things in the past that result in a criminal record, making it harder to get a job. I was a phone call away from walking away from the entire situation, but was lucky enough to have a friend answer that phone call and keep me in the game sort of speak. I must take care of myself and get my head in a good, Healthy place.