I think the stereotype of all females as careless shop-aholics, racking up debt and then looking for a sugar daddy to bail them out is just that, a well worn out stereotype with no basis in truth. What would matter to me is what they learned from it and are doing differently. I suspect the answer depends in part whether you are dating or whether you are married. You will disappoint each other, not on purpose, but you will. If you're a fan of space, inconsistent talking and independence, dating an addict will bring out your worst. In my book, living at home up until age 25 is acceptable, provided the guy was going through schooling or saving up money. When you start to discuss bigger matters with the person you are dating, you are in essence letting them know that you are thinking further down the road.
This is worth repeating: Money is the number one problem in marriages and the number one cause of divorce. When you get serious, money becomes everything. She only met him for coffee the one time this was before I met him and never contacted him back, as she had the same impression. He offered to take her for some fast food or something quick. But almost always, all problems in a relationship find their place in ten big areas. This is a warning sign of future selfish behavior. Studio Firma Even the best relationships are sometimes messy and chaotic, but drugs are an immediate escape and a quick way to temporary nirvana.
At some point or the other, these problems have a way of creeping into your romance. Unfortunately this is an ever-growing percentage of the male population. Money is basically the number one reason married couples fight. So while women can and do make their own money, in case of emergencies, child care, life expenses etc, women like to insure stability and security in relationships through properly maintaining and accruing finances. Both can contribute minimally financially if we moved in or married so I have to decide whether to overlook them because they may never be financially stable.
Pay attention to how he behaves with money. You're allowed to hate her a little bit for this. We also cook together or will contribute. Most of my female friends take the same approach to life that I do, and like me, they have no trouble getting dates. It was so insane and detailed and completely took away from the sexiness of the evening.
Tell him your concerns, emphasizing that you trust him but that you would feel better about everything if he checked in every once in a while. Anyone can make gross and insulting generalizations. While there may be good reasons for this arrangement, it does bring up a cause for concern. Evan makes this apt point, as do many of the comments. Not more than a couple hundred bucks, but I had one.
There are enough people on both ends of the spectrum. It can be difficult to be clear-headed in a dating relationship. As there are plenty of other women who are nothing like the women you describe, I conclude that you keep picking the women with the same flaws. The final straw was when I was very sick. If your date is not teachable A man who is unwilling to take counsel shows that he is prideful instead of humble. This is my personal experience dating a drug addict.
Should I find some courage to cut the party off? This guy I have met is really a wonderful guy. She insisted that that her decision was not influenced by materialism or social status. Love is a delicate balance between dependency and passion. A motorcycle is cheaper than a car and better on gas. If you desire to have a marriage relationship built on Scripture, you will want to marry a man who will be a strong spiritual leader to you and your future family.
So, where do you find the balance? Men spend their money on what matters to them, like cars, sports, entertainment, recreational, etc. And, not every guy who has a guitar plays at clubs. So from my personal experience it can work if the other person is willing to change their ways. However, after a few dates, guys get tired of always paying. Proceeding With Caution While it may be too far to write someone off who is bad with money, it may be a major red flag if you are with someone who is terrible with money. He may seem strong and independent, but he may actually be prideful.
They blame other people, the high unemployment rate or other circumstances beyond their control for this lack of employment. But them being too quiet isn't good either, like you need to have a good balance from the first date or it's probably not going to get better with time. I still feel that if you allow people to pay for you, you are giving them some amount of control over you so I am uncomfortable allowing people to pay. A survey of 1,000 people by FreeCreditScore. Perhaps women want to see that they and their partners will be able to support themselves on two incomes. I think twinkle is right in that a lot of men will put up with these types of women if they look good enough, so these guys are definitely contributing to the problem. A user-interface designer for a biotech company.